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How to Talk to Someone With Dementia: A Guide to Effective Communication

How to Talk to Someone With Dementia: A Guide to Effective Communication


Kelly Moran
Kelly Moran | Senior Care Expert
Director of Aging and Dementia Services at StoryPoint Group
How to Talk to Someone With Dementia: A Guide to Effective Communication

Communicating and connecting with loved ones dealing with memory loss or dementia can be a frustrating challenge. As dementia progresses, some individuals may start to struggle with remembering names, finding words or following conversations. They might also have difficulty understanding what others are saying or expressing their own thoughts. We truly understand this can be a very stressful time for everyone involved. For loved ones or inexperienced caregivers, it can be challenging to know how to talk to dementia patients.

Fortunately, you don’t have to figure it all out alone. Even less commonly used forms of communication, like touch or facial expressions, can help foster deeper connections. But, learning how to talk to someone with dementia can help your loved one feel heard and valued, despite the challenges dementia brings. In this blog, we’ll explore the common communication challenges caused by dementia and how to connect effectively with someone living with memory impairments.

 

How Dementia Affects Communication Skills

Dementia can change the way a person communicates. At first, these changes can be confusing and frustrating for both the person with dementia and their loved ones. Understanding these changes can help you learn how to talk with someone with dementia and communicate more effectively.

One of the first signs of dementia is often trouble finding the right words. Your loved one might know what they want to say, but struggle to remember the words. They might also repeat themselves or ask the same question several times. This can make conversations slower and more challenging.

And, as dementia progresses, your loved one might struggle to follow conversations. They may have trouble understanding what others are saying, especially if there are multiple people talking or if the conversation moves quickly. This can make them feel overwhelmed and anxious.

Additionally, people with dementia might mix up words or use nonsensical phrases. They might say “thingy” when they mean “spoon” or mix up similar-sounding words. This can make it hard for you to understand what they need or want. Finally, dementia can affect a person’s ability to read and write. They might have difficulty following written instructions or writing down their thoughts, even if they were once avid readers or enjoyed writing letters.

 

Common Communication Challenges

Understanding the common communication challenges caused by dementia can help family members and caregivers be more patient and supportive. If you’re living with someone who has dementia, it’s important to stay calm, speak slowly and use simple words.

Remember, your loved one isn’t being difficult on purpose; they’re doing their best with the abilities they have, and being patient and understanding can make a big difference in helping them feel more comfortable and connected.

  • Finding the right words: A person with dementia might struggle to find the right words. They may pause often or use general terms like “thing” instead of specific names. This can make conversations slow and sometimes confusing.
  • Repeating themselves: It’s common for someone with dementia to repeat the same question or story several times. This happens because they might not remember asking it before or telling the story already.
  • Losing train of thought: They may start a sentence and then forget what they were going to say. This can make it hard to follow their thoughts and respond appropriately.
  • Understanding conversations: People with dementia might have trouble understanding what others are saying, especially if the conversation is fast or involves complex ideas.
  • Misinterpreting words or actions: Sometimes, people with dementia can misunderstand words or actions, leading to frustration or distress. They might take things very literally or get upset over minor misunderstandings.
  • Difficulty with reading and writing: As dementia progresses, reading and writing can become more difficult. This can make it hard for them to understand written instructions or fill out forms.

 

Senior holding hands with caregiver

Communication Strategies for Everyday Conversations

Communicating with someone living with dementia can be challenging. If you’re wondering how to talk to someone with dementia, these practical tips can help make your conversations more meaningful:

  1. Stay calm and patient: Patience is key. Give your loved one time to process what you’re saying and to respond. Try to remain calm, even if the conversation isn’t going as planned.
    Use simple words and sentences: Keep your language simple and clear. Use short sentences and avoid complicated words. This makes it easier for your loved one to understand and follow the conversation.
  2. Speak slowly and clearly: Speaking too quickly can be confusing for people with dementia. Try to talk at a relaxed pace. This can make your words more clear and easier to hear.
  3. Maintain eye contact: Look at your loved one when you’re speaking. Eye contact helps show that you care and are engaged in the conversation. It also helps them focus on what you’re saying.
  4. Use non-verbal cues: Sometimes, actions speak louder than words. Use other forms of communication, like gestures, facial expressions and touch, to help communicate your message. A gentle touch on the hand or a warm smile can go a long way.
  5. Listen actively: Listening is just as important as speaking. Show that you’re listening by nodding or giving verbal cues like “I see” or “I understand.” This encourages them to continue expressing themselves.
  6. Avoid arguing or correcting: If your loved one says something that isn’t accurate, try not to argue or correct them. It’s more important to make them feel heard and understood than to be right.
  7. Ask yes or no questions: Open-ended questions can be difficult to answer. Instead, ask questions that can be answered with a simple “yes” or “no.” For example, instead of asking, “What do you want to eat?” you could ask, “Would you like some soup?”
  8. Create a quiet environment: Minimize distractions. Turn off the TV or radio, and find a quiet place to talk. A calm environment helps your loved one focus on the conversation.
  9. Be reassuring: Offer comfort and reassurance. Let them know that they are safe and that you are there for them. Positive affirmations can help reduce anxiety and confusion.

 

Senior in the kitchen cutting food

Adapting Your Approach as Dementia Progresses

As dementia progresses, it’s important to adapt your approach to meet your loved one’s changing needs. Remember, your family member isn’t being difficult on purpose; they’re doing their best with the abilities they have. Being patient and understanding can make a big difference in helping them feel more comfortable and connected. Here are some key resources that can offer additional support and guidance:

  • Local support groups can provide a space to share experiences and learn how to talk to someone with dementia from others in similar situations. Many communities have groups where caregivers meet regularly, offering a chance to exchange tips and find emotional support.
  • Online forums and websites dedicated to dementia care can also be valuable. These platforms often feature advice from experts and other caregivers who understand how to talk to someone with memory impairments.
  • Consider using educational materials, like books specifically about dementia care. They can provide practical tips on how to talk to someone with dementia.
  • Professional services, such as memory care, can provide your loved one with specialized care if their needs exceed what you can provide at home.

 

StoryPoint Group Is Here for You and Your Loved One

At StoryPoint Group communities, we understand the challenges you face in providing the best care for your loved one. That’s why we’re here to offer you all the support you need. If you have questions about memory care or any other type of senior living, we’re here to help you. Give us a call today at 1-844-275-9990 or visit a StoryPoint Group community near your location.

Kelly Moran

Kelly Moran | Senior Care Expert

Director of Aging and Dementia Services at StoryPoint Group

With more than 30 years of experience in social work, homecare, life enrichment programming and volunteer programs, Kelly is a foremost expert in senior care services. She is particularly noted for her work with dementia and memory care residents.
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